Too little self-acceptance? Are you tired of that? Free yourself
By Lucy Schaaphok
10 - 24 February 2027
Are you struggling to accept yourself as you are? This is often because throughout our lives we are taught how to be, how to look, what success looks like, how to behave, and that keeps us away from our authenticity. Are you tired of that? In this blog, I explain to you what is at the heart of self-acceptance and how you can do something about it.
This was passed down from generation to generation because we were not allowed to be the way we are, that was a sin.
Deep inside, we want to be seen and we think that happens when we conform to the image that others, but also unconsciously we impose on ourselves.
Unconsciously because we internalize voices from our parents, peers. We make them our own voices, parts of our inner personalities.
Having difficulty with self-acceptance
These voices keep us away from our authenticity, from our wild woman (or man) that we are. We have been polished over and over again, at home, at school, by society, by our peers.
The wildness is gone. And of course it is necessary to learn to function in a society, to be able to tune in to others, but how far should this go?
The advantage of getting older can be that you care less about appearance, about status. Because of experiences you’ve had in your life, you know it’s not about that.
Matter is useful, but it does not bring happiness. So what does bring happiness? In my mind, that’s being authentic, totally yourself. Accepting all that is within you, including the shadow that is within you.
The core of self-acceptance
Accepting the wild pieces in yourself that may not be adjusted, that’s what it’s all about, accepting emotions, desires, everything can be there.
It is important to shine light on all these things so that you show more and more facets of yourself, living. Rough facets, polished facets, balancing with each other, forming a unity, reinforcing each other.
When you need less and less from yourself, when you suppress less and less shadow within yourself, energy is released. Vitality, desire, pleasure, on deep levels.
Tips for greater self-acceptance
Do you fit the picture of who you should be according to your upbringing and society? Or can your raw, wild self still be there too, including your shadow pieces? If you want the latter then these tips are important for you.
1. Accept that you don’t have to be good at everything
2. Be curious about yourself
3. Do things that scare you
4. Feel your emotions
5. Share your vulnerability with others
6. Don’t believe everything you think
7. Talk to your inner critic
It takes so much energy to push away shadow pieces and conform to something you are not. You would rather “have to do less,” release more energy and thereby come to self-acceptance. That’s just possible.
